As parents raise children, we teach them to say “I’m sorry” when they do something wrong to begin teaching them how apologies and forgiveness work in life. How is it that apologies and forgiveness take on a level of difficulty when maturity and wisdom are supposed to be leading in the lives of adults? It seems the answer to this is pride standing in the way of making things right.
Looking back at the sermon that was presented on Philippians 3:13-14 on January 23 the spiritual aspect of forgiveness was examined. There are many lessons to be learned about forgiveness regardless of how young or old we may be and the most important lessons on this topic must be taken from Scripture and applied into our lives. Going back to the example of parents raising children, it is the duty of all adults to be setting the standard by which all must live and for which our young people must strive to attain.
When we read the New Testament and see how the word forgive is used, it is incredible to see that the original Greek language has four different words used to say “forgive” and each mean the same thing, to forgive and to forget. Are we, New Testament Christians, and fellow citizens of this world, practicing forgiveness in our daily lives? Many will say that the offender needs to come and ask to be forgiven for forgiveness to take place but when we read the Bible this is not necessarily true. In Matthew 18:21-35 Jesus gives instruction regarding forgiveness and how we are to be freely giving it and not carrying contempt around in our hearts towards our fellow man. Remember, we must forgive to be forgiven by the Father in Heaven (Matt. 6:14-15)
It is also crucial to remember that forgiveness begins with ourselves and then to others which is a difficult task to accomplish. When we are unable to forgive ourselves, we find it virtually impossible to forgive anyone else, which leads to issues in how we interact with others.
A prime example of the lack of forgiveness and destroying a relationship is in a marriage when a spouse is unable, or refuses, to forgive their mate of some wrongdoing. Whatever the issue, anger and malice are permitted to fester in the heart of the one offended which leads to arguments, broken communication and an unscriptural example left for children, relatives, friends, and church family to witness. When each married couple stood before God and pledged their lives to one another in His presence it was “in sickness and in health, till death do us part,” which encompasses every aspect of life. But all too often the psychological and spiritual aspects are forgotten and allowed to be corrupted by the lack of forgiveness.
In Ephesians 5, Paul explains how we are to walk in the love of God (vv.1-7) and how we are to walk in the light of His love (vv.8-14) and in wisdom (vv.15-21). Then, in verses 22-33, he talks about how marriage is compared to Christ and the church, and then speaks of how children are to be obedient to their parents in 6:1-4 with the concluding thought, “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” How are children to be obedient to their parents when the parents are unable to respect one another? What about the anger that is sown in the hearts of the children and the encouragement to begin taking sides with one parent against the other?
How dare we as New Testament Christians to ever allow such behavior to make its presence known in our lives. Shame on us! if such is allowed. Again, what kind of example are we setting for our young people when mom and dad fuss, feud and argue all the time and that’s all the children see? We need to go back and read Matthew 18:1-5 and take Jesus at His word and humble ourselves, (yes adults this is aimed at you), back to the behavior that we expect from our children.
Our Father in Heaven demands such of those who are His children (Matt. 6:14-15). If we can accomplish this, peace and harmony will be restored to our society and culture where it belongs. May the grace of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ bless each of us as we travel through this life together.
-by Jonathan Bennett
